Zach Wilson has been moved from the kennel to the outhouse

When Gianni Infantino was making his World Cup speech (I’m Emir … I’m Twitter … I’m Jimbo Fisher) in an attempt to make people forget that he’s just a plain old sleaze bag and grifter, created a template for all his future speeches. Today for example: I’m Zach Wilson.

Infantino … wow, Wilson, is the recently demoted quarterback of the New York Jets, has fallen out with head coach Robert Saleh and most of the rest of the Jets staff, and is now considered less valuable to the Jets’ immediate future than Mike White, Joe Flacco, or that case of Gianni Infantino. He was anything but declared a throwaway fraternity couch Wednesday in Saleh’s pro forma show ‘n tell, in part because of his brutal performance in Sunday’s 10-3 loss to New England, in part because he deftly sidestepped everyone . responsible for his role in 3, and partly as near as we can tell because he is almost unbearably smug about his place in the world of football. In his opinion, he’s doing a hell of a job, which makes him Liz Truss, Elon Musk and, well, Gianni Infantino.

Telling the nation that buyer’s remorse is all the rage in Hempstead, Saleh, who famously described the Jets’ offense Sunday (103 total yards, six first downs, 10 points) as “dog shit,” offered these indirect and aggressive cues:

Oath:

Oath:

Oath:

And then there was this answer:

In short, Wilson is buried at the moment on a team that is 6-4 but sits in eighth place in the seven-team AFC playoff race, tearing itself apart as if it were the Jets’ regular season. Despite having the protection of being no. 2 draft pick in 2021, he’s being held accountable for not being accountable, responsible, competent, or even likable, and for, well, inspirational football jargon like “dog shit.” As of this moment, he is having a worse year than no. 3 pick, Trey Lance, who just broke his ankle and could be on the verge of losing his job to the guy he took the job from, Lazarus T. Garoppolo.

In fact, the 2021 quarterback-rich draft (though clearly not rich) has given us Trevor Lawrence, who is the Jacksonville Jaguar with all the shame that comes with it; Wilson, who is hated by most of his team despite Saleh’s insistence that he is not really hated; Lance, who is watching Garoppolo cheat career suicide on a weekly basis; Justin Fields, who tries with limited success to make people forget that the Bears are still the Bears; and Mac Jones, who has four touchdowns and seven interceptions for the Patriots. 2021 quarterback Davis Mills went in the third round and is playing for the 1-8-1 Houston Texans. And we’ve skipped Kyle Trask and Kellen Mond and forgotten to add Ian Book and Sam Ehlinger, the latter of whom inadvertently helped turn Frank Reich into Jeff Saturday.

In short, the quarterback is closer than usual to a setback, to the point where the Los Angeles Rams just added to their practice squad a man made entirely from scraps of old backup names: Case Cookus. Sometimes this argument just writes itself.

But on this day, and apparently for the foreseeable future, Wilson is the last of all of these (including Case Cookus). He is held responsible for (capitals fully intended here) KEEPING THE NEW YORK JETS THE NEW YORK JETS. The only thing that could make it worse is if he goes on stage soon and says plain and simple: I am Gianni Infantino.

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